For three years I had you in my life, every day Now all I have are a bunch of tears But I couldn't stay I had no idea I would have to get used to not having you around I knew eventually, one of us would die But knowing you are alive, and not having you is keeping me down Now all I can do is cry I have felt pain before Worse pain than this But sometimes, its so hard to get up off the floor Not when, you are what I really m...

Looking into my heart, I wonder what you will see. You won't see Love and you won't see flowers. You won't see something pretty You will see something Dark You will see something evil Something so unreal Something so cruel You will see the real pain I feel because I can't hide it on the inside I can't hide if you are already looking into my heart What is it that you want to see What is it, do you think you will see you wo...

Jim and I had been together for seven years. We met in college and got married shortly after I graduated. He went on to become a police officer and I went on to medical School. Our relationship had some rough patches. I was going to school to become a surgeon. I worked 100 hour weeks, I hardly had any free time. My life belonged to the hospital, and Jim's life belonged to the state.Last week I was at work, and my phone wa...

It's a rainy day in my eyes, And the tears fall down like in a thunderstorm.If you can look past the tears falling, and look into my eyes,You will see, it's dark, cold, like a thunderstorm. You think I'm the girl, who would fit in a Summer world.Where everything is pretty, and simple and beautiful.But, very few understand, that I go through the day, like in the middle of Winter world.It's dark, and it's scary, and it's as...

She is only 20 years old. And she has gone through the worst pain in the world. She got pregnant after a one-night-stand.  People whisper behind her back Calling her a slut. Everyone thinks it best to abort the baby But she doesn't. The father of the baby, seems like a nice guy He is around at times, during her pregnancy. The baby is born And this 20 year old woman, has fallen in Love with the most beautiful babygirl. At...

Happy Birthday Emily. Today is your second birthday, and this is not how I thought I'd be spending it. If I cried, I thought the tears would be from Joy, Not from the pain I am feeling. Today is your second birthday, and this is not how I should be spending it. I wonder everyday, if you are watching over me, and know how I am feeling. Do you know that your mommy misses you, more than anything in this world? Do you know, t...

Is this what it feels like to lose the one you love? How can you explain to others, when it was your choice to end it? How could a heart, hurt this bad, when it was supposed to be love? Is this going to be as hard as it gets, or is just going to go worse from here? I loved her. Everyone who knew me, knew how much I loved her But it wasn't working, and it hadn't been working for a long time. Now I am left, sitting here, on...

The cold silver blade sits there in front of me.I know what its job is, and what it has to do to me.Picking up the blade with two of my fingers.Tracing the blade gently across my other fingers. Bringing the blade up to my lips, and giving it a soft kiss.I smile and know, the blade will soon bring me amazing bliss.The blade from my hand, goes down to my wristAnd with the pressure from my hand, I push the blade down on my w...

Today is your birthday, and my heart longs for you.Today is your birthday, and I can't help but miss you.Today is your birthday, and I feel so lost and alone.Today is your birthday, and I hope you are not spending this day alone. I hope you have an amazing day.I hope you are with Emily today.Today is a day I miss you more than usual.Today, I am thinking about you more than usual. Happy birthday mom, my heart is crying out...

BloodHurtPainSadnessAll something I know so much.HappinessJoyExcitementJoyAll something I crave to knowBloodFalling from the wristHurtSomething I feel deep in my heartPainSomething I wanna feelSadnessSomething I will always knowBloodHurtPainSadnessBloodGives me a hopeHurtTakes a chancePainThe gift of trusting peopleSadnessThe proof that I am an idiotBlood falling down my wristAs I add more hurt to my bodyBring on the pain...

As today came, and I knew it wouldMemories of you came flooding like they shouldHow much I wish I could go back in timeand say goodbye, if I had to, I'd commit a crime.Today was one of the hardest days in a long time for meI had no idea how hard this could be.Tears are falling down my faceI truly hate going to this place.The cemetery is not a fun place to goBut I know I need to go, in order to grow.I just wish it didn't b...

If you had to go on to Heaven, There is one thing I wish you took with you,and that would be your cell phone.Oh, how much you loved to talk on your phone.If you had your phone with you,I would call you everyday,Just to hear your voice,and for you to tell me it's going to be okay.If you could not take me with you to heaven,I'd wish you took your phone,So I could call you when I needed advice,Or on days like today when I ju...

The following poem was written by me. It's my own work. I ask if you re-post it anywhere, you ask for my permission 1st. Thank you.Blade to wrist,Blood to arms,Arms to chest,Chest to heart,Heart to pain.The blade to my wrist,Takes away the pain in my heart.I focus on the pain in my arms,and for a moment it helps me forget the pain in my heart.Once there was love in my heart, and joy,Now most of the time, all I feel is hur...

My eyes start to open and I see mama standing there.As everything become clear, I keep wondering why I'm there.Mama has tears rolling down her face,And I notice that scared hurt lost look in her face.I have this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.Mama comes over, and kisses my forehead and puts a hand on my stomach.“Why am I here?” I ask mama.“Where is Emily?” I ask mama.She looks at me, with those deep blue eyes,and I...

Don't say you love me, if you are going to hurt me. Don't say you will be there for me, if you are going to leave me. Don't say you don't want me in pain, when you are causing the pain.Don't tell me you are sorry for hurting me,If you are going to turn around and do it again to me.Don't tell me that it's all going to be okay,When you are the one stopping me from being okay. Don't tell me you know what I am going through,w...