She climbs up the ladder, lands at the tight rope, her trick of choice. She will attempt to walk it, straight across, without leaning either way. She is fine until halfway through, then her foot slips and she plummets to the left--but she catches herself. She holds onto the wire with one hand, and she works to pull herself back up, but her mind tells her to just give up. She stays there a while, just hanging, two voices a...

Why does it have to be me? You lie in bed asleep, While I sit in a dark corner,Petrified of my own thoughts. I can't sleep because you'll be there.  Slowly I slip into madness. Pounding my head against the wall, Screaming at the shadows in my closet. Why can't anyone hear me?! Why will no one listen?! I just want to sleep. I just want to live my life without the fear of seeing you again. Then everything goes silent. I'm s...

Oh great, here comes the mood, You never know how you'll be.Sometimes I cry because your rude,You must know this and agree.Please get rid of this stress,And stop talking about it.It's just an absolute mess,It bugs me; I hate to admit.You say you'll take care of this,But another month goes by.This is not happy bliss,All this shit makes me cry.There are things that need to be done,I wish you'd get it together.All this stres...

Here tears reign,And Self cannot be pulled togetherWhen Self is screaming, torn asunder,Where empty shell is welling up whilstEyes of others rollAgainst the failings of thisSelfish child,So called becauseShe cannot rule whatOthers hide and stow away.'Midst the back streets of her mind,Her common sense is raging cruelTo lash her weakness,Scorn self-pityAnd loathe the drama queenShe...Is?She knows not where or when they sto...

"Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything, Because of you I don't know how to let anyone else in, Because of you I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty, Because of you..."She opens her new closet door and runs right into herself. The owners before them must have forgotten the mirror. Her eyes are distant and sad, her movements both curious and anxious. She bites her lip, the stops because she looks stu...

I have things to do, people to talk to, places to call in order to live my life. My mom reminds me of this every single day. So does my dad, though in a more harsh and sarcastic manner. I need to call so the bill doesn't go to collection, but don't they understand? Every time I pick up a phone to call someone or to answer it, my heart races and my mind makes up all kinds of situations where everything goes wrong and I say...

I often wonder what you think, Your actions are different then mine.We really are never quite in sync,You're always working never giving me time.There's more to life then just work,I'm needing more from you.When you're home, you act like a jerk,When I'm here, I sit and stew.I always try to reach out,Nothing is said it really hurts.I'm numb and mostly pout,You're stressed and always curt.It wasn't always this way,It's so h...

I was hopeful for a lovely day, But you just can't give me the time.I'm so miserable in so many ways,Loving you is really a crime.A simple hello would be nice,Ask me how I'm doing.Your mood is as cold as ice,Your behavior is not even amusing. You never have anything to say,I find you an absolute bore.You act like your miles away,I dream of walking out the door.I fantasize about running far away,To a house by the sea.The s...

"Why?"The word that pops into my head every day. Why? I don't know. Maybe I'm thinking about past experiences. My life. Being depressed. Everything. Nothing. I don't know.People tell me I say 'I don't know' too much. But I don't care. Why should I? There it is again. Why?The five Ws. It was always the fifth. Who. What. Where. When. Why. Number five. But then 'How' would pop up just to make sure that Why wasn't stuck on th...

It's like the world is crashing around me I'm drowning and suffocating under my own breath Like reaching for a branch that isn't there Only to be plunged back under the water Swirling around in circles All the while telling myself everything will be okay But I never felt comfort in saying that Just as I think the storm has settled down I hear a clap of thunder behind me Only to be hit by hail so fast and so big That I fee...

When black clouds swarm around meand reach down deep inside,I push away the darknessand huddle close and hide.I tremble with the terrorthat has me in its frame,the dead tide sweeps across me asa darkness and a flame. I drown beneath those waters,I choke on that dead air;the fire creeps up my bodyfrom my feet up to my hair.As demons eat my entrailsand goblins burn my skin,I knock at Satan’s foetid doorbut he won’t let me i...

Laughingwith friends.Smilingand happy.Jokingfor fun.Bouncingabout,Nothingwrong.Denied.Goingto parties.Dancingthe night away.Walkingwith my head up.Singing,free-spirited.Denied.Crying happy tears instead ofsad.Looking in the mirror,Loving myself instead ofhating.Awaking instead ofsleeping.Breathing instead ofdrowning.Denied.Living instead ofdyingto be okay.Denied.

I'm that girl the one that's loud only because  I'm afraid of not being heard I'm that girl The one that's always smiling because  If I don't the pain will become unbearable... again I'm that girl the one that tells people they're beautiful because I know how it feels when you don't feel beautiful I'm that girl the one that's afraid people will leave so I push them away because I'd rather not have my heart broken I'm that...

A cut above, a cut below- suicide can be very slow Peer pressures are getting to you- is this the only thing that you can do? For your family and friends now come the burdens and tears Not knowing you had those fears. How do you think your family and friends will survive? Not knowing your life was on the line. You see the blood draining from your wrists Asking yourself: why did I do this? Second thoughts are now too late...

I am bathed in my own morals On the curve of the beachIn the damp sand Where the water rises to greet And then slips silently awayEbbs and flows Under the oblivious light of the moonThe wind fingers my hairBut offers no armsI am alone with my lossesAnd my painsSo subjectiveIs regretAn ache that progressesOnce it states its claimIt clamps down on the heartProhibits the normalcy of just ...breathing I am my own cautionary t...