No one seems to understand eating disorders. If I'm being honest, I still have a lot to learn about them too, but I know enough to tell you what for if you tell someone who has Anorexia "just eat" or someone with Binge Eating Disorder that it's "just willpower" and to "just tell yourself no" because it is not that fucking easy. Now you can joke and laugh all you like about how I'm "too serious" all the time or ask me if t...

Ever gotten on here with the full intent to write something down? To write everything down, to write all of your thoughts, your feelings, everything that's happening right now, to write it all down in a poem, but you can't seem to get it out onto the screen. You just can't write down everything in words because there's no equivalent to what you're feeling in poetry or words. There's no way to tell everyone anything in all...

Tick-Tock. The clock as she  undresses for bed. Tick-tock. The clock as she  waits for him to  come in. Tick-tock. The clock as she hears the door  open. Click. Him coming in. Swoosh. His boxers and Tee as He walks her way. Tick-tock. The clock as she waits for help. Drip-drop. Her sweat, as no one comes, drops down onto the floor. Creak. The bed as He climbs on. Sigh. Him as He thinks of what's to come. Whimper. Her as s...

I'm listening to it now, the thing that brings you to mind, every time. The one I listen to constantly, because I can't do without, because I need it like... ...addicts need their drug ...alcoholics need their drink ...texters need their phones. Because I need it so much, Just to remember you, To know that you're always there... But you're always out of my reach. The song is my heart beat As I cry out for you to come to m...

Poems are Only  Emotions written on the papers Made of my heart Strings.

Will I find my answers toall these questions in my lifetime? Will I stop what needs to be stopped? Will I do all I have to inthe time that I have? Or will I  just be another unfinished half? Did you find you answers in Death, Sirs? Did you stop what needed stopping?Did you do all you had to in the time you had? Or were you just another un- finished soul? Can they find the answers they need answered? Can they stop all they...

Your voice is runnin' through my mind, I can't stop seein' ya behind my eyelids, You've been gone a while now, but it's just sunk in... I'm so goddamn tired of sayin' goodbye, I'm sure you'd agree. *** The sound of your voice has gone from my memories, but the few times I saw you play through my mind, You've been gone so long now, and it sunk in a while ago, I'm so gosh darn tired of sayin' goodbye, I think you'd agree wi...

...a gold leash. We don't care... We aren't caught up in your love affair. And we'll never be royals. It's just not in our blood, that kinda lux just ain't for us." ~Lorde, Royals.I cycle down the road, stare at the trailers and mobile homes. People walk about-the kind that work for a living, Nine-to-fives, two jobs,maybe three, just to get by that month. My music blasts in my ears,filling every thought with the images of...

Her hands tremble, running through her hair in an anxious gesture. The alien four walls around her seem to be pressing closer the longer she stays here; compressing all of the echos of words, all of her stray thoughts, all of her fear into her tiny little bubble. Her icy calm exterior begins to crack where the warmth of little fingertips traces. The signs of it melting trickle down her face in tiny salt water streams. His...

Her hands shake by her sides, clenched into fists as she holds back a scream... or a punch. They just keep taunting her, laughing and labeling like she's a piece of meat to be packaged, or a can of soup waiting for the label that will be there for the customer's convenience. "Emo whore," one shouts. "Cutterslut," another says. "Hey, if I give you a buck, how much'll you do for me?!" Everybody laughs. Everybody thinks that...

She climbs up the ladder, lands at the tight rope, her trick of choice. She will attempt to walk it, straight across, without leaning either way. She is fine until halfway through, then her foot slips and she plummets to the left--but she catches herself. She holds onto the wire with one hand, and she works to pull herself back up, but her mind tells her to just give up. She stays there a while, just hanging, two voices a...

I'm back at work now... working as a waitress at Applebee's. Taking down orders from customers, taking orders from the managers and the cooks. They don't yell much, but any loud or unfamiliar noises send fear and adrenaline skittering all the way through my body and flashbacks through my mind. Nobody really ever notices unless I stay there for too long and don't come back to the restaurant fast enough. Usually that's when...

I always wanted to be a cop when I was young. To hold a gun and shoot down the bad guys. I never imagined I'd shoot down some good guys as well. I never imagined I'd fall head over heels in love with the bravest, most amazing man in the world, have two beautiful children with him... and then lose him so soon. Never imagined such evils as a war that began with valid reasoning behind it and ended being all about oil and oth...

A year after coming home..."Mommy! Mommy, my girl scout troop is walking in the parade tomorrow, do you wanna walk with us?" Kristi, 7, runs up and tugs on my shirt sleeve. Her smile is so wide and hopeful, I am conflicted in how to answer her. I know what I should say, to be a good mother, but I heard the parade here at home last year. They set it up so it's at the center of town, a good five miles from here. I should sa...

"...'cause honestly, I'm not that strong. I'm not alright, I'm broken inside, broken inside... I'm not alright x3. That's why I need you." -Sanctus Real, I'm Not Alright.I sniffle and I trembleunder blankets too warmand loneliness too heavy.He doesn't care,Loneliness. He doesn'tcare if I can't carry himright now. He just pileson top while Anxiety makesme panic on the bus andfeel like an idiot whenI try to pick up the phon...