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Anonymous

Looking Better With Every Beer

Hoisted on one's own petard

To keep my evenings copasetic, I imbibe my usual anaestheticDraught beer may not be classy, but it’s cheapTherefore, I end most of my days, in a somewhat alcoholic hazeBefore I stumble home along the street This establishment, so necessary, the pub, my friendly sanctuaryMy nightly refuge from the daily grindWhere I commence self-degradation and blame it on inebriationUntil escorted out the door at closing time Consuming b...

Tales From The Nowhere Pub: The Captain's Visit

Two naval officers visit the Nowhere Pub

Captain Llewellyn Gavin Crayford — “Captain Crayford” to many, “Cap” or “Cap’n” to most of his crew, and “LG” to his friends — disembarked from his ship, Running Light, with a sigh. Most of his crew were already off the ship, glad to have some shore leave. His ship was now officially down for maintenance for at least a week, with just a rotating skeleton crew for the duration. The Chief Engineer and he had agreed that the...

Tales From The Nowhere Pub: The Nowhere Pub

Introducing the Nowhere Pub - a cross-dimensional pub for adventurers

I was sure I had walked down this side street hundreds of times. How could I have never seen this pub before?All right, granted, there wasn’t even really a sign for it. There was just a very tattered-looking board sitting off to the side of a front window that was so caked with dirt it was impossible to see through.Even so, mate, how the hell could I have missed a pub that was within about 15 minutes of home?It had been a...

Tom

Orphan taken into family catches a burgler.

Tom by 1941aaa I was orphaned at an early age and was most fortunate to be taken in by Peter and Mary Withers, for I took the place of the child they never had. Peter was the gamekeeper for Lord Carlton on his estate in Wiltshire and Mary helped out in the house when they had guests, which was mostly in the shooting season. We lived in the lodge at the entrance to the estate and were about a mile from the small village do...

Old Lady With A Can

A little old lady sitting in her flat talks about life whilst drinking a can of lager.

It’s freezing out there. I wouldn’t throw a cat out on a night like this. Still, it’ll soon be summer. I usually go down to the pub, have a drink with my friends Madge and Doris, but it’s too cold to go out tonight. I thought I’d stop in, have a can of lager instead. The Red Lion, that’s my local. Bill’s a nice man, the landlord. He never begrudges giving me a free drink, not that I take advantage of him, mind you. I got...