Lived Stories

Life starts life ends. You can never revist the moment it all began. Pain and joy a temporary. Life is a path in which the destination is unknown.  You stand you fall yet you will never remember it all.  Destiny and destruction lay in your hands. Contemplating which path to take when you meet a fork in the road. Will you fall will you rise.  Is it right is it wrong.  Guided only by emotions you begin to walk aimlessly.  W...

Slowly, Jim and the wizard ascended through the roof of the house and began to undergo metamorphosis into their true reptilian form. Meanwhile, the young man without a face had the Senior Horse tied to a candy pole, ready for the removal of its lymphatic system and modification of the genetic structure to become the Second great liver bomb of the Pancreas Province. The wizard and Jim had no idea how to make Steak Diane......

As Jim entered the room, he noticed the Senior horse had dissappeared. The room he had just walked into was full of albino walruses excreting donkey livers.As Jim flopped around the room, the Tall Wizard of the library appeared behind him, Screeching the words of the polish national anthem, "Jeszcze Polska nie zginela,Kiedy my zyjemy!Co nam obca przemoc wziela,Szabla odbierzemy!""Hello there wizard!" said Jim, "do you kno...

Jim and the young man backed into the corner of the cave. "Hello my young liversquabs, what may I do for you and your friend," exclaimed the Senior Horse as he vomited midget Llamas from his third mouth on his earlobe."Great and powerful Senior Horse, we seek the ale-producing doorknobs that legend say can be found in the Pancreas Province!" replied Jim."Yes," continued the horse, "the knobs do exist, in the holiday home...

"Good sir!" exclaimed the young man, "I know of such doorknobs! They can be found in the Pancreas Province in the den of Fruit cakes!"The tall wizard turned to the man and began to urinate. All of a sudden, the floor began to shake as a piddle-portal to the multiverse opened up.Jim and the young man were thrown through the portal with the force of a thousand elephant tusks and were brought before the mystical rabid gerbil...

One day, Jim the weekend cleaner was hired by a rich young man to clean his weekend. Jim arrived at the young man's house on friday at 3:00pm and was ushered into the dining room."It is time to begin the sacred ritual of the banana of Pisang Raja!" exclaimed Jim.Jim got into his Llama-skin enchanting coat and began to throw pixie dust at the three large goats that sat in the corner on a bed of phlegm and orange skins. The...