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Scars to Tattoos

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352 words 352 words

I no longer need to make
marks on me

A professional who tattoos
has set me free

When certain thoughts
return and intrude
back into my life
for reasons unknown

I try to quiet them
appease, silence the poison
but I am unable to stop or cope

I wear a myriad of scars
Self-inflicted not that long ago

Shocking and saddening myself
family and friends at a time
when I was so very low

The voices had quieted
over the years

Lately, so many stresses
and health scares brought
back all those fears

One day I cried over thoughts
how will I get out of this mess

Searching for my Exacto knives
knowing how those I loved would
feel helpless and hurt

Pushing aside the need to purge
I browsed online late at night
and found

Pretty pictures of colorful
tattoos, all shapes, sizes
anything one could desire
ready to be brought to life

A light went off in my head
I'd check it out
What did I have to lose

After investigating, researching
some more, I made my first move

My first visit to a tattoo
parlor shop
I'd decided on what I would do

A dream catcher to celebrate
the first gift my love ever gave me
A nod to my sons as well
Warding away nightmares
they each had one over their beds

A few changes made to the center
An atom to celebrate the
scientist in each of them

Admiring my choice
I can look every day and feel calm

I no longer need to cut
into my flesh leaving ugly scars
I've added beauty to my skin

Luckily my thoughts usually
remain straight and true
or my body would be
covered in lines thick and thin

I now have three tattoos
the latest brand new
a reminder of my success
over some nasty cells

The word balance to stare at
on my wrist as a reminder to me

That making my skin pay the price
for my unstable thoughts
is no longer an option, I'm free

Any marks on my skin
I'll leave to the professionals now

 

Published 
Written by gillianleeza
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