Is it really all that kinky
if I offer you my Twinkie
and suggest that you could eat it just for fun?

If I promise not to trickle
when I hand you my big pickle
will you share it or just quickly turn and run?

I know you’d find it icky
if I said your fig was sticky
since you got it wet and left it in the heat.

And you’d punch me in the chest
if I reached out and grabbed your breast
so I could get a small taste of your chicken meat.

If I say that you’ll be moister
when you gulp some of my oyster
will our conversation strike an angry note?

If I ask you to come near
and just to nibble on my spear
will that stop broccoli from sticking in your throat?

Please don’t misunderstand me
I’m as literal as I can be.
I’m simply talking here about some snacks.

But if you doubt my candor
I’ll let you assuage your anger.
You can come and give me forty whacks.