I will state one unequivocal thing about my colonic: I hated it! Please note that we have a colon used in a sentence referencing a colonic. I humbly suggest that usage like this henceforth be called a punctuation pun---just a thought that dashed through my brain.

“What are other examples of punctuation puns?” you might question markedly.

How about:

“There is no doubt. She missed her menstrual cycle. Period.”

“I hate you!” she exclaimed pointedly.

After knocking him to the ground, the martial artist killed him with a comma.

The possibilities become more fascinating if we also allow formatting puns.

“I don’t care what you think,” he boldly declared.

He was an indentured servant.

“The impending bankruptcy underlined the firm’s financial difficulties.

The business operated
on large margins.

The company was in dire need of CAPITAL INVESTMENT.

Is all of this just silly patter? Perhaps. But my hope is that at least some will find it amusing, and maybe even a bit
e
d
g
y
!