I am finding it increasingly difficult to witness chaotic confusion at work without letting it bother me. Three hours into my day and I want to scream over the radio “EVERYONE CALM THE FUCK DOWN”!!, but instead I will calm down and vent here. Lucky you.

You see, the problem is, most of my staff is not “seasoned.” They have no idea what mid-March and spring break will bring us. I do. A fucking flood of people with unimaginable demands, weeks without sleep, days without food, and really no ability to think of anything other than the task at hand, and did I take that coffee maker to the Front Desk? Who was it for again? FUCK. I can’t wait. I love peak season. But I am not one who has to work faster to get more done. I have learned from hundreds of mistakes, I tend to make more mistakes if I rush. Is that just me, or do we all need to slow down?

“No one wants to be a waitress when they grow up.” That’s what my father always told my two younger sisters and I. Guess what? Yup both my sisters are waitresses, and I have spent over 25 years serving food and tending bar. Short shifts, big money, and a great appreciation for one’s memory and patience. I find it is the easiest way to make money without selling drugs or myself… Haha-the legal way to make a living. When my kids were born, I switched departments and became a Director. It is fun, but I do miss the acting part of being a server, or best, a bartender. I challenge anyone to work in a restaurant for one year and not learn how to smile through stress, and multitask like a motherfucker.

So, all of that being said, it is nearly time for lunch when I get to witness….Panting. Stress. Chaos. PANIC!!!! And try not to say “shut the fuck up” with my body language. Nor in my tone. I did get in trouble (a STERN talking to) about cursing over the radio and at work in general. Of course, the whole lecture, all I could think was “what the fuck? This is some fucking bullshit right here. I don’t curse over the radio. Do I? These people are fucking crazy”. Sure as shit, I do NOT curse outwardly, but it is implied in my tone. THANK YOU!!! It has taken decades to perfect and I could not be prouder of myself!!

Ha! Another quick turn has been added for the day. PANIC! What will we do?!?! Shut up and work faster bitches. Duh. I mean, “don’t worry. We will get everything done. We always do.” I always do. I am a freak like that. But I guess that’s just me…..nearly noon, game face on….. I do pay my employees for a 30-minute lunch break. Today I will be timing those who keep asking "how will we get all of our work done by 4:00?". It should be fun. Thanks for listening and tip your servers and bartenders.