About 20 some years ago there was no social media. Those wishing to meet people of the opposite sex had only a few options. One was attempting to meet a would be lover at a bar, not a good idea. The second was to attend one of the singles dancers. The cheapest was to use the personal ads in the newspaper.

There were literally 2 full pages of these mini ads and the paper broke them down into various categories. Men seeking Woman, Woman seeking Men, Men seeking Men and Women seeking Women. Responding cost nothing and there was a small fee if you wanted to place and ad.

You were limited to the words you used and you paid for each word. There was an account number attached to the ad where you could hear a more detailed message. Those and those interested could leave their number and provide a more descriptive response. I had gone through a bad breakup and as soon as I was sure the next female would not be my attempt to rebound I responded to a few ad and then placed one of my own. I soon learned that most of the ladies in this fair city suffered from the same afflictions.

1. They did not read the ad in full or listen to the detailed message on my account.

2. They lived in houses that did not have mirrors or bathroom scales.

3. Being 50 lbs over weight was considered a little heavy.

The first lady that responded to my ad sounded very nice on the phone. We talked for a few days before meeting. As we chatted she made cute comments about having put on on a little weight over the Winter and could not wear her teeny tiny tops any longer. If it was done in an effort to pique my curiosity it worked and we planned a face to face date at a local pub.

Well I was correct in my first assumption, she had not put on a little weight but she had packed on a lot of weight. She was attractive and personable and after about an hour the pub became loud and crowded, so she suggested we go to her apartment. I was somewhat taken aback by this boldness but I accepted.

At her apartment we chatted and drank a little, but there was no attraction to her on my part. Then a face appeared at the sliding glass doors that went out to her mini patio and I almost jumped outta my skin in surprise. It seems an ex boyfriend was stalking her. The police had been contacted and a report filed, but he still persisted because they could never catch him.

I went outside to see if I could spot him. I was still a police officer at the time and always carried an off duty weapon but he was gone and shortly after that so was I.

I got a letter in the mail from her a few days later. She went on about wanting to cook me dinner and having a longer chat. She then admitted she had a cop from another department run my plate and give her my address. I wrote back saying if I ever found out the identity of this cop I would report him for using the police computer and giving the information to non police personnel was a big no no. Thankfully I never heard from her again.