Some things never change and silent prayers are still said for the departed, along with those things that are never said and are still better off left alone and unsaid. In most cases all I ever asked was to be taken as I am, and I know I am not magnificent in any way and had been fooling myself that I was. It’s my life and I know I won’t live forever, and still I decided and have been doing things my way. Standing tall and not backing down when called out as I held my ground, against all those who decided that I couldn’t give the unforgiving minute sixty seconds of both effort and run and yet they were never there to witness any of the pleasure and/or pain felt.

And whether or not there is emotion involved they have never been clearly defined just like those crimes and misdemeanors I have been charged with. I know I have done so many things wrong and there are times when I don’t know what to do right here in this moment of my life. Wondering if there are those who will still give me a chance, for I know I would rather die than let you down. Right now I am doing the best that I can though I might be feeling as though I am still walking through those shadows that have descended and I am looking for light, with there still being hills and mountains to cross. Still I rely and believe in that old heart of mine, and you can always give it a try and maybe redemption can be found?

Maybe I am just too dumb for never considering to give up on all things, for every second can be a lifetime and each minute that passes brings me and all of us closer to God. Still, it seems like nothing seen is nothing but the red lights, with seconds in the sunshine at times equals a decade in the darkness, with nothing seeming like it’s changing in any way. At times closing my eyes and turning to stone with what seems to be ice water in my veins, and has me wondering if I should have followed the lead of those others and drunk a cup deep from those rivers of blindness? Then maybe I wouldn’t suffer as you look into my eyes and see hardly anything left to lose. And I never let you down though I might seem to be always on the run.

So show me a dream that we can follow and let it shine bright like a knife, so hope can be found for tomorrow. And we both know that the sun may never rise again, with it being a question of when? With there being times when it feels as though we are staring down the barrel of a loaded gun and just waiting to hear the hammer be pulled back, with the feeling like all things are about to explode. And there are times when I want to tell you how I feel, and the only thing that seems to come out is that single word of; stay.

You know I could give you my devotion and really don’t need this life and just need someone to die for, and if and when I am standing in the fires of Hell I can look the devil in the eye and simply say there is no hell deeper than my pride and that I was brave enough to believe in what I did and to die. And that’s why I tell you not to look back, (though we all seem to look back). Possibly being my destiny and I know we have been victims of the night and this might be our last chance. So hold your breath and count to ten, and stand tall to face it all when worlds collide and the days are dark and the darkness falls at noon to be reflected in a spoon, as the lamp of laughter slowly dies. So put your hand in mine and just let the cards fall where they will, and continue on down the line.

Copyright: Timberwolf International LTD. July 2016 – 34