All Hearts Come Home for Christmas

The small window afforded little in the way of a view. Not that there was much to see; it was snowing like crazy outside. As I settled back into my seat with a sigh, the thought that some icy catastrophe would result in the plane crashing crossed my mind. It didn’t make me any happier about the vacation that had been imposed upon me.

A glance down at my hand caused another frown. The ring on my finger glittered in the light shining from above the seat. It made me miss Robert all the more. I didn’t want to go on this trip. The preference to be home feeling sorry for myself over the holidays was strong. My company was going to be less than desirable.

“Would you stop already?”

I glanced out of the corner of my eye at my mother. There was a warning glare firmly in place as she stared at me. The fact that she was near the top of my fecal roster didn’t seem to register to her. That or she didn’t care.

“Not that it matters, Mother, but I really don’t want to be here,” I responded. “Robert can’t even call me! I had no way to let him know where we were going or what the number is.” I chewed on my bottom lip for a moment before I continued. “It’s bad enough I can’t see him at Christmas. Now, I can’t talk to him, either.” I took a deep breath in an effort to hold off the tears threatening. “I haven’t seen him in almost a year, you know.”

Mom looked forward at the seat in front of her for several seconds and shook her head. “Meagan, if you’re going to be a military wife, this is something that’s going to be the norm. You need to experience it now and see if it’s what you want.”

I narrowed my eyes when she said the last part. It was no secret that my mother wasn’t fond of Robert. When I’d started dating him four years ago, she’d thrown a fit that rivaled any that a four year old could have done. I never understood her dislike of him. He’d tried to get along with her, but eventually gave up. Now he just did the cordial polite thing.

“Mom,” I began. She held up a hand to stop me.

“I already know,” she snapped. “I don’t know what’s so wrong with me wanting you to be sure. I want you to explore the possibility that this may not be what you want.”

I rolled my eyes and turned back to the window. The conversation was going to dissolve into an argument unless something stopped it. Luckily the flight attendant chose that moment to stop by.

She leaned over her beverage cart and peered at us. “Hello, ladies! Can I get you anything?” Her cheerful tone grated on my sour mood. “Soda? Water?”

“White wine,” my mother ordered.

I looked at the attendant and bit back my initial response. “Soda is fine.” What I really wanted was stronger and heavy on alcohol content. Mom would have an immediate coronary, however. Me not being twenty-one and all.

“So, what brings you out to fly the friendly skies on Christmas Eve?” she inquired as she passed out our drinks. “Visiting family?”

“My husband and his parents,” Mom informed her. “They’re older, so we had to go to them this year. It’ll be a nice family get together.”

I snorted, earning a glare that should have set my hair on fire. I ducked my head and took a gulp of my drink, then proceeded to choke when I accidentally swallowed a piece of ice. My day just kept getting better and better.

The attendant murmured something about having a nice holiday­–yeah, right–then moved on to the next set of passengers. This left me alone with the woman who radiated displeasure. That was okay, though. I happened to be miserable and found that misery loved company. Cliché, but true.

“There was no call for that, young lady,” she scolded. “It won’t kill you to be with us for Christmas. This will probably be your grandmother’s last one. Her health is that bad, just so you know.” I opened my mouth to respond to that shocking statement, but she kept going. “Just because you can’t talk to your fiancé doesn’t mean you get to make Grandma’s holiday a nightmare. Understood?”

I nodded my head, dazed, before I hung it down, abashed. I’d known her health had gone downhill the past few months. I’d been so wrapped up in missing Robert and attending college I hadn’t realized Grandma’s health was so bad. The stirrings of remorse began to overtake my mood and completed the holiday disaster for real. I was done.

Quiet settled between us for the remainder of the flight. Lost in thought, it came as some surprise when the ‘fasten seat belt’ sign flashed on overhead. A quick glance out my window showed the lights of Bangor, Maine sparkling in the falling snow. A shudder went through the plane as the landing gear dropped into place and I scrambled in my seat to gather my belongings in preparation to disembark once we landed. I just hoped that the pilot knew what he was doing, landing in this weather.

Upon landing and then taxiing to the gate, I stood from my seat in expectation of trying to be one of the first off the plane. I was surprised when my mom took my wrist and tugged me back down to my seat next to her and proceeded to just study me. I looked at her in confusion as the other passengers bumped and scurried past us, eager to get off the plane and start their Christmas cheer. Raising an eyebrow, I finally gave in and asked, “Mom? Are you okay?”

She heaved a sigh and shook her head slightly. “When did you grow up on me, Meggie?”

I winced at the nickname I’d insisted that she not use since I was thirteen. I flashed her a grimacing smile. “Probably about the same time I told you not to call me that anymore,” I reminded her.

She laughed softly then looked away at the rapidly emptying plane around us. “I guess we should go. But I wanted you to know something, sweetheart.”

“What’s that?”

“I don’t hate Robert, honey. I just don’t like that you’re going to have the life that you will when you marry him. You’re going to have to deal with a lot of loneliness and heartbreak.” She glanced down at her hand on my wrist that she still held and squeezed gently. “I just want you to have a happy and full life is all.”

The words were so unexpected that my jaw dropped. “What?” Then her whole statement processed. She’d said when. When, not if. Whoa. That was huge! But I still needed to address it.

“Mom, I love him. He’s what makes me feel complete. I might miss him, but I’m never lonely. And I will never regret him.”

She nodded with a sad smile. “Yeah, I’m kind of starting to understand that,” she said with a wry tone. “I’ll try harder, okay?”

I couldn’t believe it. That was the most she’d ever agreed to when it came to Robert Munroe! I knew I needed to grab this and make the most of it. I threw my arms around her and hugged her tight. “I love you, Mom! Thank you!” I said, my voice watery and cracking.

She hummed a response and then said, “C’mon! We need to get off this plane. Someone’s waiting for us to pick us up.”

Color me surprised. We usually got a rental when we came to Maine. “Oh? Dad’s here, then?”

She just shrugged and grabbed her coat and carryon before slipping out into the aisle of the plane. I followed her and hurried after her when I saw we were the last to leave. As we stepped through the door and into the exit corridor, the attendant that had served us called out, “Have a Merry Christmas, you two!”

I waved back to her in acknowledgment and raced after my mother. The woman was a powerhouse despite her damn heels and I had no idea how she walked as fast as she did. One usually had to jog to keep up with her. Get me into a pair of those and I’d practically break my neck if I tried to ‘walk’ like that.

I’d just caught up with her at the main gate for our flight when she stopped suddenly and I plowed into her back. She stumbled forward a step but kept her balance. I, however, bounced backward and landed on my butt. Just as I was about to demand to know what her problem was, she stepped quickly to the side and the area in front of her cleared of people. Standing in the center of the waiting area stood a sight I didn’t think I’d see for quite a while.

There was my Robert, decked out in his Army dress uniform, smiling that signature panty-dropping grin at me.

I looked at my mother in confusion. “How…? What…? I don’t understand!”

She smiled at me. “Merry Christmas, Meagan. Your father and I managed to get him home to be with you this year.”

At that moment, I don’t think I’d ever loved my mother more. She knew what I needed that Christmas. And I was reminded of something that my grandmother had once said.

“All hearts come home for Christmas, dear.”