Now I'm a pacifist you see
Peace and love and mungbeans for me
But on the night you came to stay
Things shifted...

I left the room with dinner in hand
A relaxing evening I had planned
But returning to the kitchen
I grew livid.

As bold as brass you munched away
On potatos left sitting on a plate
And as you casually looked up at me
I wondered...

Could I grab your tail and toss you outside
Or yell at you and give you a fright
But as I pondered your ending
You absconded.

Off to bed I took myself
The kitchen benches wiped, dishes on the shelf
But around the hour of midnight
I awoke...

The scurrying feet, a squeaking voice
I had to look, I had no choice
And as I stood in the fluro light
I choked.

The rubbish fallen across the tiles
The pellets strewn for what seemed like miles
I felt the fury rising
And I resolved...

This is war, you've made it start
You have brought murder to my Heart
It's my house, you're not welcome,
You've been told.

Sleep abandoned, I paced the floor
I swore revenge, I set my jaw
When dawn finally broke
I had my battle plan...

And so the madness did begin
I developed a maniacal grin
I knew your days were numbered
My ideas were grand.

I laid down traps and planted baits
But to my horror you avoided this fate
And morning after morning
Destruction reigned...

I couldn't sleep, became obsessed
The rest of my life became a mess
And finally I knew
Clarity came.

And as I crouched behind the trees
I smelt the jasmine and felt the breeze
And pushed down on the button
Victory was close...

My bones did rattle as the house blew up
But I felt that nothing could interrupt
The adrenaline coursing through me
Then I froze.

A small grey figure climbed over the rubble
Leaping around without any trouble
And pausing in its' travels
It looked over...

Our eyes connected and I kid you not
I swear it laughed as it found a spot
To sit amongst the chaos
And to savour.

A piece of potato it held in its' paws
I watched as it disappeared into its' jaws
And falling to my knees
I realised...

There'd never been a single chance
For the rat was a Master and had known at a glance
That I would come undone
It was no surprise.

So the lesson of this tale is that
If you ever tangle with a rat
Before you go any further
Take a moment...

Remember me in my disturbed state
And know that for you it's not to late
You don't have to lose it all
To a wily rodent!