Had I known your friendship had conditions
I would not have been your friend.
Had I known you would not ever try to listen
I would not have put effort to speak.
Had I known you would use every excuse
I would not have expected more from you
You want to say I lead you on
You want to say I used you
You want to say I'm wrong
You want to say that I should talk to you
And yet all I did was talk to you
And yet all I did was hold you accountable
And yet all I did was be patient with you
And yet all I did was give all I could
I will not let myself be disrespected
When you want to joke at my expense.
I will not let myself fall back into who I was
When you could not handle accountability.
I don't owe you anything
No, not even an explanation
I don't control your actions
No, I am not at fault for others either.
Had I known your friendship was toxic
I would not have been your friend
Had I known you would have become obsessive
I would not have been complacent.
Had I known you would only care when you were hurt but not me.
I would not have been there in the first place.