The day I told him I could die,

I felt so empty inside

The joy and happiness we shared

burned to ashes in our mind.

How can life make us decide...

to live?

Or to die.

Fate is cruel and destiny warped,

the beginning of our adventure

seemed like ages ago.

When he proudly blog and shared

our little bit of joy.

Dates posted, pictures showed

our little bundle would come with the snow.

With summer came heat and worry,

but our hearts stayed strong and full.

Racing, pounding constricting pains

I played it off and paid it no heed.

I hid the signs as it grew worse,

blackness and seizing shakes took over.

I cursed myself for past mistakes,

as it came to a choice we would have to make.

I beat myself up, that he had to do it.

Lucky for me, my mind never knew it.

No man should ever be put in that position

to choose between loves..present and future.

I'll never forgive myself, 

but for him, I love him even more.

He chose my life...

what else could I ever ask for.

For now I'll pray to whatever gods may be,

that one day we shall have a huge and happy family.