It was our first date 

Lights dim and plates full

Perfect words spoken at just the right time

He said everything I wanted him to say

He did everything I hoped that he would do 

He walked me to my door like the perfect gentleman

He even held the door open for me while I got in the car

But no matter what was happening, all I could think of was you

Your image engraved into my mind as if you were there since the beginning

Your voice echoed in my brain as if all I could understand was your tone

Your scent etched into my senses as if all I lived and breathed was your smell

Your words a permanent reminder of everything I ever wanted and all that I couldn't have 

You said we were too different but isn't that what made us unique? 

Isn't that what made us a shooting star in the midst of the entire universe that all you could ever see was us? 

When you said different, I pictured wonderful

I pictured forever

I pictured a beautiful painting with a rainbow of colors blended in the perfect way

Oh I can see it now

A splash of color in a boring world

A beautiful field of nothing but happiness and joy 

A smile so bright that you don't even need light.

But, maybe I was delusional 

You stay imprisoned in my mind for all eternity

The ghost of what we could have accomplished a prisoner in the padded locked room that is my mind 

A puzzle to be solved that was left only half done 

An abandoned building that could have been the most sublime in its existence

I blame myself for our downfall

I blame myself for you walking away 

I couldn't fathom the world without you 

I had to face it though 

After us was destruction 

A hurricane of emotions tearing everything down in its path that we had worked so hard to build up

Remorse and pain very apparent by the evidence displayed

A tsunami of tears drenching my face at just the thought of your name

A forced smile because I was always told that I looked prettier with a smile

All I wanted was you, but all you wanted was someone else

A constant fear was left after that day

I constantly wondered what I could have done to keep your attention

I constantly worried 

But, you told me not to

Maybe I should have worried more

I wondered if I could have saved us

I wondered what I could have done to have your attention on me and not someone else

We were always so wrapped up in ourselves and each other until the day you were wrapped up in her

I wondered where we went wrong 

Then, I saw it 

I loved you too much, but you, not enough.