"Mayday! Mayday! The ship is slowly sinking

They think I'm crazy but they don't know the feeling."

-My Demons, Starset.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I don't know if I can do it. I work at Walmart- you don't understand. It's their biggest sale night and everyone mobs there to get the best deals of the year. It's worse than Black Friday. Actually, Black Friday at Walmart was dead last year, but on Thanksgiving you can't move from your little cashiering box, because they are everywhere, surrounding you in a solid wall of customers. 

You. Can't. Move. 

I. Can't. Breathe.

Every day leading up to Thanksgiving just gets worse and worse (busier and busier) and if I couldn't breathe yesterday, I don't know how I'm going to survive tomorrow. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I keep hoping that they'll just chuck me in the liquor shop and call it good, but I know they won't. I'll be stuck on a quick check for two hours, suffocating and trying to keep it together until the end of my shift when I can finally fall apart at home in my room and panic there because I can't at work or I will shatter and not get back together.

My throat is closing up, my heart is beating faster, faster, faster. My chest hurts. I can't breathe. I can't think. I can't see. I can't do this. How does anybody do this?

Please can't I just stay home tomorrow and hide in my room?

Please?

Oh, I hope I can get through this.

"...Something's got a grip on me. Oh why something's got a grip on me." -Stilrize, Anxiety.