As the night went on, my mood stayed high, it was oddly good though didn't know why. I sat here and read endless stories, even got to speak with Kitty. He always cheers me up, even when he doesn't try. This night, I didn't need cheering up, but he was still fun to chat with, as he always is.
Come midnight I start to get sleepy, but stay on-line with Kitty, he is hard to say bye to. Though once 1:00 am came rolling around, I bid him a farewell, and headed to bed. I did my nightly routine, with nothing out of the ordinary. I snuggled down in bed, and drifted off to sleep.
It’s then the dreams started endless ones at that. I, of course dreamed of him, I always do. However later in my sleep I started an odd dream. I’m not sure how it came about. I remember most of the details (which isn't normal for me). My mum, myself, sister and even a cousin were in this building, I’m not sure what one, one I think we were suppose to know. At least in the dream we did.
We were walking up flights, and flights of stairs. It seemed endless, but we kept at it, until we reached where we were supposed to go, and suddenly the building shifted. As if it lost its balance, and slanted, all of a sudden the floor gave way, and broke into shattering pieces. My cousin was first to go, she fell fast, I don’t know why.
My first instinct was to grab my mum’s hand, and I tried, I tried so hard. It almost felt like the scene in Titanic, when the ship finally sinks and Rose and Jack are sucked into the water, and he tells her not to let go of his hand, but the suction is strong they lose each other, and her hand swirls in the water for his. Yeah, it was like that.
I tried, I did, I reached so hard for my mum. We fell, and suddenly I wake with a horrible scream. It wasn't a scream just in my dream, I woke up with one. I screamed so loud it made my ears hurt, my head pound, and my heart race so hard I thought it might explode inside my chest. It took me a moment to realize it was just a nightmare, but it scared me so much.
I wanted to call my mum, and see if she’s okay. You’re thinking what grown adult does this? Well, this one does. I didn't though, it was 3:45 in the morning, and didn't want to wake her. I did call her this morning and ask if she was okay, she said of course I am baby-girl, what’s wrong. I told her the story, and she made me feel all better.
For some reason, throughout my life I have always had nightmares of bad things happening to my mum and I. I've had house fires, car accidents, and worse things happen. One’s I don’t ever wish to think of again, let alone speak of. I’m known for having night terrors, and scary nightmares. I even sleep walk, which is never fun. I don’t know why most of my bad dreams coincide with my mum. It scares me that something bad will happen. I love my mum, and hate when nights like that happen.
This truly happened to me last night; it’s fresh in my mind and haunting me still. I really rather people not judge me for it. I don’t want to hear your negative thoughts, keep them to yourself. I just for some reason had to express this in writing.
