Wondering if I have a choice if I stand my ground and if my voice will be heard? Holding on to the lessons hard fought and won in the past, with only you and I standing together in the city streets where the heat can be felt. Wondering at times who is the one clever and wise, and which one is the one telling all the lies? While sometimes it never stops raining and there are times when I miss nothing, and other times when I miss everything. With there being times when all I need is the air that I breathe for I know there are places and times where the blues are brewing and can give one the feeling that you want to die, as it seems all is nothing but paper fantasies, while the new untold lies are listened for. As silence seems to be heard loudly and manages to tell me nearly everything and has me remembering that when I was younger, I seemed to know everything while thinking I was being wise with no compromising. Never thinking that death would have us pay for those sins that are carried and will finally be paid for.
When sitting in the eye of the storm, I have my faith and mercy keep me warm after having seen all the dreams become tattered and torn. It’s a long road heading down the line with the Devil smiling at the trouble he has in mind and hopes I will stumble and fall as I make my way. Still, I confound him by continuing to try to cash my bad luck in as I keep bluffing and tryin’ to win with a losing hand, and there are times when I lose, and all of it seems to be like a grand illusion and life being nothing but a ball of confusion. With there being times when it is wondered who the hell we are, as most of us just grow older and time can be a trick that can be turned to cheat us.
Standing here in the open and feeling that lonesome wind blowing near those rivers of blindness, and I know some know how to hurt me and cut to the bone while I kept my faith. Standing my ground and not turning around in the search for some truth I can use while checking my weapons and holding onto those certainties I know. Forgetting their laughter and reassigning them all different faces and names, so they won’t be remembered as who they but, rather as what they are. For most still, have had the nerve to call themselves friends as they stood around when I lay on the ground bleeding from all the kicks and blows. Now I’m walking through this weary world and ain’t talking carrying those lessons hard fought and won, knowing if I show a sign of weakness there will be no mercy with all being lost. But, if I catch them I will hit them hard with their lies and watch them crack.
Passing by those wounded flowers hanging from the vine, at times feeling as if I am burning knowing in the human heart evil can dwell. With prayer having the power to heal (on your knees boy), and times I am feeling weak and weary, and still, I continue down the line avoiding the rumours, speculation, and idle conversation, while following that road that leads west. Just keep picking them up and putting them down and continuing on my way to where I am directed to the next moment which then flows. There are those I will stand with and attempt to lift up as well as try to keep them safe or to give them strength to hold on through it all. With us being under the same skies and the same dark light of the sun which can make all seem close and at the same time far from these rivers.
Dylan said it best about having one good friend, and all will be all right, and guessing I’m doing better than that as I got me a few good friends with some being those I would stop a bullet for, and maybe run through the night for them. Lots don’t seem to understand that, but then again, they never will and seem at times they are lost in their own daydreams while they sit and drink it all off their minds waiting for their turn to die thinking the world slapped them across the face with no one listening. Still, I follow a code of silence, that I swore to myself a long time ago and taught myself to look at things from a different angle, after having played all the games before, and then a few know why I keep my silence and know that if a vow was made then there are reasons along with things that must be left alone forever.
This might be my kingdom come, with some already having plans to say a requiem and with my grave having been dug and still, there are those I won’t let down or hide the truth from the end of my life to the end of their life though we are all flawed in some way.
Copyright: Timberwolf International LTD. April 2017 – 27
