Well I’m beginning to hear voices and there’s no one around, and I’m feeling all used up and the fields have turned brown, and I feel like I am waist deep in the ground mist with the feeling like I almost don’t exist. There’s too many people to recall, some of whom I thought were friends of mine, but I was wrong about them, and reality always seems like it has too many heads, with some things lasting a lot longer than you think they will, and these are some of the kinds of things you can never kill no matter how hard you try.

It seems as though I am feeling my way through the darkness at times and feels as if I am being guided in those times by a beating heart. I really don’t know where the journey will ever end, but I sure as hell know where it started, as I make my way on down the line. And I have heard them say that I am too young to understand, and that I am caught up in a dream, with life passing me by if I don’t open up my eyes . And that at times is just fine by me, as I ask that I be woken up when all of this is over, or when I am finally a bit wiser and older. As I question all the time I have spent that seemed as if I was just out on this old Highway 61, or where I was directed to be finding myself? With there being times it felt like I had tried carrying the weight of the world, with only my two hands.

There were times when I wished that I could stay forever young and not be afraid to close my eyes, and I know damned well that life can be nothing more than a game for some and also their pantomime. And still there's an endless road to discover with blood being thicker than water, and there are times I wonder what if I'm far from home? And would I hear anybody call, or would I be able to hang on when things got too intense? I know that nothing ever lasts forever, it just seems like it does.

And there are the times when the walls come crashing down on things, all the way to Hell, with no one ever seeing them standing or ever saw them when they fell. And they can be felt sometimes when they come crashing down and fill me with self doubt making me believe in myself almost as much as I doubt myself. But, then again this is my life and for living it I will pay, and there is no turning back on some things; most of my life I've felt this way and questioned myself and felt I could never find the right words to say. And then again I have been called out at times and taken down to the front lines, with the world turned upside down, and things ain’t been the same when those times happen.

We're all sinners, and we all have the potential to be saints, and everything on earth dies alone. With there being times I thought I heard an angel cry, and thought I felt those teardrops falling from his eyes, when I felt like I had a blue moon in my eyes after the blues descended and walked on through. And I do believe in miracles, and want to be able to save my soul, for I know that I am a sinner and might just end up dying out in the cold.

With there being those times that make me wonder if I will ever know the meaning of things as they appear to others, as if being locked in a room where the light won't find me, when I don’t know how to feel, or wish I didn’t function.

Copyright Timberwolf International LTD: November 2015 – 19