I got told off at work the other day. Not uncommon, the children always have an answer for everything, and I am constantly getting attitude and sass, but I just sass them straight back. I am teaching the next generation to be sarcastic assholes. You're welcome, society.

The particular boy who told me off, has no language skills. He is on the autistic spectrum and he has a specialist who comes into see him a few times a week, so she communicates to him through sign language, which the other staff members have started learning and using as well. Now, this boy, although he cannot speak or articulate clearly, he can understand when you speak to him, or tell him to do something. Typically male, he has selective hearing, and only hears what he wants, and only listens when he feels like it. The other times he can just shake his head at you or say 'Nah' one of a few words he does know. Despite his cognitive learning disabilites, he is rather clever.

One of his favourite things to do, is to go down to this dirty, half-assed garden area at the end of the playground, and look for snails and slugs in the garden. He and his little friends enjoy doing that. They also enjoy squishing the snails and looking at the mess they have made. Gross, but you know, it's what children do.

So the other day, this boy had a small container with two snails in there. He came over to show me, grabbing my hand to get my attention.

"You've been looking for snails," I said to him. He nodded his head and pointed to the snails in the container. He pointed to the garden down the other end of the playground. "You found them in the garden?" I asked him. He nodded his head at me, and then pointed to a specific area of the small garden. "By the apple tree?" I asked.

"Ah huh," he said to me, nodding his head. He communicates mostly in noises that for the most part, are unintelligible, although he is getting better at saying words.

I then did something incredibly terrible and mean, and put my finger in the container and touched the back of the snail's shell. Well, this boy told me off. He pointed his little finger at me, wagging it back and forth. "Do do do de de doo do do da do do do DO DO."

When he speaks to you, it is mostly him saying 'do do do' making noises like that, but his intent was there. I had committed a crime in his eyes of touching one of his snails, and he was telling me off. I learned my lesson. Never again would I touch one of his snails.

Another thing this boy does, which is really cute and funny, is he sounds his alarm. If one his friend's gets hurt, or something happens, to get the attentions of the teachers, he has an alarm. "Wooooo wooooo we-ow we-ow we-ow." And we know that something has happened with that little rat pack of boys.

For someome with little to no language skills, he is really cheeky, and he is such a flirt. He manages to flirt with the teachers making his 'do do do' noises, or he'll come up to you, sit on your lap and stroke your cheek, play with your hair and look deep into your eyes. He's such a flirt. Except yesterday, he may have gone a step too far, when he came up behind me while I was talking to one of the parents, and he slapped my ass. When I looked down at him, he was looking up at me, laughing his little head off, the cheekiest grin on his face.  Now, I'm all for a good spanking, but I prefer the older men, not the cheeky, grinning four year old. Although he is very cute.