1. NaNO!WriMo: Do not write anything — not a single word — for 30 days. The challenge is tougher than it might seem.
2. NaDoWriMo: Chronicle every episode of The Simpsons in which Homer exclaims, "D'oh!" This, of course, requires watching every episode of The Simpsons. Not a bad way to spend the month.
3. NaSloWriMo: Writing shouldn't be a race. Take it slowly, savoring the process, and don't worry about the number of words on the page or screen. What a novel concept! But not a full novel — that would take a year or longer at this pace.
4. NaGroWriMo: Make out a grocery list each day of the month. Every. Single. Day.
5. NaProWriMo: Procrastinate about NaNoWriMo until after Thanksgiving, yet still expect to write 50,000 words by the end of November. Fail miserably. Pledge not to wait so long to get started next year. Recall that the same promise was made last year, which stirs feelings of self-recrimination and shame. Eat all the leftover stuffing, while swearing to begin a new diet regimen “tomorrow.”
6. NaFroWriMo: Write an essay on the Afro, its history and significance in the United States. Bonus points for having hair in an Afro while doing so.
7. NaSloMoWriMo: All writing must be done in slow motion. For an added challenge, throttle down to super slo-mo.
8. NaFroYoWriMo: Spend the month extolling the cold, creamy, flavorful wonders of frozen yogurt.
9. NaGloWriMo: The world needs to know more about Gloucester, Mass., America’s oldest seaport. Hop to it — Gloucester isn’t getting any younger, y’know!
10. NaJoWriMo: What goes better with writing than coffee? Nothing! So why not settle in with a cup o' joe and wax poetic about the life-affirming elixir?
11. NaGo!WriMo: Do your writing two minutes at a time each Friday by visiting J.D. Mader’s weekly flash fiction write-in, #2minutesgo. Even though it won’t result in a novel this month, it might spark next year’s NaNoWriMo project. You never know.
12. NaBroWriMo: Just kidding. Dude, real bros don’t write.
13. NaMoWriMo: Write more than usual, give or take a little, with no pressure to reach a certain word count or keep up with friends who somehow manage to crank out 10,000 words a day. That's it. You're welcome.
14. NaCroWriMo: Choose a different “cro” word for each day of the challenge. Here are a few ideas: Cro-Magnons, crocodiles, crockery, Walter Cronkite, crocheting, Croatia, cross-training, crowdfunding, crop circles, and crows. In 3-2-1, go!
15. NaCoWriMo: Team up with a buddy and write in tandem for National Co-Writing Month.
16. NaRhinoWriMo: There are hundreds of rhinoceroses in zoos and sanctuaries across the U.S. Their stories need to be told.
17. NaYOLOWriMo: Hey, you only live once! Don't waste precious time spewing out a giant word salad. Instead, write something meaningful, something to remember and be proud of for years to come. It needn't be lengthy or learned; a single character could suffice. Indeed, a checkmark next to Clinton/Kaine would do nicely.
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