Weekends at the house aren’t normal weekends where the teenager sleeps in and the parents leave her alone, then tease her with, “Oh my gosh, it’s alive!” when she finally wakes up around noon or one in the afternoon. No, weekends here I get up at about 7:30 in the morning, take a quick shower, get dressed in cover-ups and start walking. I don’t exactly walk anywhere in particular, but I bring my backpack with food (a couple handfuls of chips, so they don’t notice them missing, and a couple cookies. Once in awhile, I’m able to sneak a few quarters too, so I can buy a drink) and a sketchbook with art supplies. Sometimes I end up at the library, sometimes a park, it depends on my mood.

This time I end up at a far-away park that neither of my parents would willingly go to. So, relaxing, I walk off to a secluded area away from where everyone else goes and take out my sketchbook, flipping it to a blank page far away from other sketches and taking out my paint and paintbrush. Normally, I’d do something like this on a canvas, but seeing as I don’t have one, a sketchbook page will work fine.

The second the brush hits the page, I’m no longer a person, I am the brush and I flow with the paper, most strokes going left and right, some diagonal. Very rarely will this brush ever flow up and down. The paint runs, but it’s meant to—draining into all the colors around it and making a brand new color unique in every way.

At the end of everything, I have a colorful abstract painting of my face and how I’d like to look one day—skinny, beautiful, the envy of every girl, fashionable, smart, and free.

Though… that won’t ever happen. Not while I’m under their roof.

Dream was nice while it lasted.

I let the painting dry some while snacking on the chips and cookies. I wasn’t able to sneak any quarters, so I’ll have to survive with the water fountains—though, that’s not too bad at this park at this time of year. It’s right between Summer and Autumn, so it’s slightly chilly and this park’s in the “middle of nowhere” to many parents. Don’t want your children kidnapped… though, I suppose, I’d rather be with a kidnapper right now. Better than here.

I pick up my stuff to leave and hear a leaf crackle, turning in that direction and seeing, of all things, Evangeline—my ex-girlfriend.

“What do you want?” I ask of her after we stare at each other for a good few minutes, images running through my mind. They are both from the year and a half we were together until high school and from seeing her in the halls more recently—sucking the faces off any and all the football players. Just like her mentor, my tormentor, Alexa.

Ange bites her lip like she used to when we’d have time alone together only now her eyes are guilty rather than lustful. I shuffle side to side nervously, remembering how, when she broke it off with me, I’d feared she’d tell everybody about my Mother’s new husband, but even through that she kept her promise. I wonder as I stand in front of her whether she’s come to tell me, warn me, that she’s going to break it.

“I suppose… I’m here… because I miss you, Phi-Phi… will you take me back?”

My jaw literally flops open and stays that way until she gently closes it. She comes close as if to kiss me, softly and sweetly like we used to or perhaps hot and heavy—also like we used to—but I back away, shaking my head.

“I don’t believe you… you- you taunted me. You taunted me as you stood right next to Alexa and Chase and all her other puppy-dog exes, how do you expect me to believe you?” My legs won’t stop backing away and my brain says to run before I lose the limited composure I have left.

“Like this.”

She pulls me into her, presses herself against me—hitting my bruise—and kisses me, hot and heavy and not at all like we used to…

Better than we used to.

When we both finally pull back, we’re both red faced and panting for breath. She lays her head on my shoulder and I hold her close, wincing only slightly as I move my wrist the wrong way. I close my eyes and lose myself in the warmth of her against me, the solidness of her in my arms. But I have to get the answer to one question.

“Why?”