You joined Alexa for a while. I saw you in the halls with the Pinheaded football players we used to laugh about. You mostly ignored me the first half of sophomore year, and, surprisingly, so did the Blonde Squad. That all changed right around finals time though. I was absent for two days and when I came back, I was ghost-like and shaky. I was the frail girl we used to joke about - the one I never thought I'd be. I actually hoped you'd come up and hug me like you used to (I was pretty delusional too) - that's why I smiled as you got closer.
You didn't hug me though. I believe your exact words were: "What're you smiling at, freak? I'm not one of your dyke buddies, I ain't gonna shove my tongue up your cunt just because you look desperate. Fuck off, this is my turf, Phil." My mouth flopped open and then your pleased smirk registered in my brain and I closed my mouth. My face went from Frail Girl to Stone Faced and I turned away with, "fuck you," on my breath.
You pretty much just hung out with whatever puppy-dog jock was following you after that. Alexa and the Blonde Squad took up their original places to bully and harass me, and teachers that were and are supposed to care continued to ignore it all.
You did that for two and a half years - six months longer than we were together - so I thought maybe you'd turned into the uncaring, slutty bitch you were acting like. At least until the park.
You live on the other end of the city from me - the rich end - what the hell were you doing at Eclipse Park? It's at least two or three miles from your house.
I had finished my painting - in a sketch book, yes, but it was a painting all the same - and I looked up and you were walking towards me. I figured maybe you were here with friends and the Blonde Squad was going to jump out of the bushes any second. Either them or one of your boytoys. But you were alone and you started talking about missing me and getting back together and I started backing away, not even caring if my crap was over there on that suddenly far away picnic table.
And then... you kissed me. I don't know what you meant by that. I have no clue if I should say yes again or if I should just walk away or if I, perhaps, should be as much of a bitch as you've been to me. I don't know if I could do that, but half of me wants to, is that bad? No. No it's not bad.
You wanna know why? Do you want to know why me wanting to hurt you isn't bad, huh? Because you left me alone. You left me all alone to deal with you back-stabbing me, Alexa and the Blonde Squad and the Pinheads to bully me. You left me alone to deal with the Stepmonster's abuse. You said you loved me, but you left me and then you hurt me and now half of me really wants to hurt you just as much... but that's impossible. Why?
Because I know you don't love me. If you loved me, if you really missed me and really cared about me, you wouldn't have done what you did. Or, at least, I'd hope you wouldn't.
I love you Evangeline - no, scratch that: I loved you, Evangeline... but I can't anymore.
You and me? We're done.
I'm sorry.