I’ve managed to get myself in a bit of a routine lately, I never thought I could. Untidiness was just one of my little ways. He said he liked that about me, at first. Of course, people change when you've been with them for a while. Now I’m as tidy as tidy can be, nothing is out of place. I’m still the same old me though, just a lot tidier.

Having a bit of a lay-in was always one of my guilty pleasures. But, he gets up early, so I get up early. After a while my body forgot all about sleeping late. Now I wake before anyone else. Reading, that’s something I never used to do. Now I read every morning, quietly of course. A chapter or two in the morning has become part of my new routine.

The way I dress has changed too. I always loved to wear long flowing dresses. Red was always my favourite. That’s another thing he used to love about me. Or so he said at the time. He didn’t like the way people looked at me. I don’t know why he thought that every man who smiled at me wanted to make love to me, he just did. The clothes I wear now wouldn’t get me a second look from anyone, grey and dowdy.

And then there's my hair of course, strawberry blonde and curly. Yet another thing he loved, at first. He said it would look better shorter. He even helped me cut it. I had a little cry that day. Now, I keep it short all the time. Once a week or so, I give it a little trim. That’s become part of my new routine. My friends, at least the few I had left, didn’t like the changes in me. It wasn’t long before they left too.

I used to love going out. Every weekend I would dress up, get my hair done and hit the tiles. Meeting my friends in a little pub I know before going off to watch a film, have a meal or sometimes a nightclub. That’s where I met him. He said he spotted me in the crowd. Love at first sight he said. The way I smiled as I danced was what first attracted him to me. I don’t dance anymore.

Not much of my old life is left really. I have some new friends now, Dickens, Hemingway and even Shakespeare. I lose myself inside their stories, a whole new world for me to discover. A world that until recently, I never knew existed. I think perhaps I should have done this years ago. I’m sure my life would have been different if I had. Perhaps I would have seen the signs, made better choices. It certainly couldn’t have made it worse.

But it is what it is. My life has changed now, I have a new routine. Wake up early, get dressed and have a read of my books. Then I make my bed, I always make my bed. I do everything the same, every day. When my little room is tidy, I stand by the door, waiting for the guard to unlock it for breakfast. Only four more years. He’ll never do that to me, or anyone, ever again.