Here's a contest some here might have a really good shot at...the idea is to come up with the worst opening line of a fictitious novel...and don't look at me btw...
It's not often where writing bad is a good thing...
The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
Where “WWW” means “Wretched Writers Welcome”
http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/
Go for it my friends...and show off that first prize trophy with pride...